Life, Or Something Like It

So every day I stand back and watch my life pass before me. It does not pass slow but fast, much faster than I would like some days. In a few weeks I will be 30 years old. Where the heck has my time gone? I know where, it's gone by the way of laundry, dishes, dirty diapers, runny noses, midnight feedings, school assembles, and sick belly's. I am a mama and that has been my life since I was 15 years old. Half my life I have been a mama and you know what? I am OK with that.

I guess my question is, what have I accomplished in my almost 30 years? Not much if I had to really look back at my life. I have not done much at all, yes I have my kids and I am content with that but what really have I done? I wanted to be a photo journalist and see the world, I wanted to be on the front lines of the war and let my pictures speak for themselves. I wanted so much to show the world what I see when looking through a lens. I wanted so much for the world to see the pain and despair along with the beauty and wonder that is around us every day.

Now I spend my day's doing school work, cleaning the house and tending to the kids. I play cards with my husband before bed and listen to music as I sit and write out blogs hoping that someone out there may like my words and keep reading. It is a far cry from speaking to the world through my lens but it's a start.

We all have our own life to pursue, our own kind of dream to be weaving. And we all have some power to make wishes come true, as long as we keep believing.
- Louisa May Alcott

The Case Of The Ex

So why is it when everything is going good the shit has to hit the fan??? I got a message out of the blue tonight on facebook from a girl that was with Tyler before I got with him. She in fact sent me a nasty message from his account on the first night he stayed over saying I was a shady bitch and we deserved each other. I was livid and wanted answers. Regardless of what was going on sleeping with a man that is in a relationship or married is not my style. I was not going to be that girl!!!

The story I got from Tyler was that he had dated her for a few months till he found out that she was only 15 years old and called it off. He said she kept harassing him and had hacked in to his account. I believed him and never got another message from her and we went on to get married and have 2 babies. I just don't get it, why would any one think it's ok to message and friend request a man that you use to date that is married with kids and why the hell would you request his wife and then proceed to tell her how he cheated and she's ok with that. 

I swear this girl is 18 years old and needs to grow the fuck up, this is in no way good practice. I am a bit livid, I want to drive down there and kick her ass. Why does she think that after almost 3 years she needs to do this and bring this up? I am a pretty jealous person and I don't want some skank lying bitch messaging my husband. He is my husband, we are married and have kids and no were is she needed....

Just A Quick Hi....

 So this is my second go with a blog but I seem to have gotten locked out of my last one, I guess that is what I get for not using it for so long. Well I wanted to do an intro so that you all can get to know me so here goes nothing;

 Well I am a mother to 7 great children, 4 girls and 3 boys. I am 29 soon to be 30 here in a few days, eeekkkk that is scary to type out. Since the age of 14 I was in the same bad relationship with my ex husband. He was mentally, verbally and physically abusive and after 12 years I called it quits. It took a long time for me to realize that I was wasting my life in the wrong relationship and in a miserable marriage and I wanted to be happy for once.

I am semi crunchy, I am a bottomfeeding,. baby wearing, extended rear facing, circumcising, pro-choice, full vaxing, formula feeding, sposie using mama and I am happy with my choices. I spent so much of my life worrying what other people though of me that I gave up bits and pieces of myself along the way. I am slowly getting myself back but it is taking some time to be comfortable in my own skin. I am me and if you don't like it then you know where the un-follow button is, don't let the virtual door hit you in the ass on the way out!!!!

I have a wonderful husband, Tyler, and I could not have asked for a better man for me. He came around just when I needed him most and he is by far the love of my life. he works his ass off for us and treats us great. I don't fear him and I know that he would never hurt me. For me that is a big thing and I am glad that we found each other. I know he was sent to me for a reason and I cherish every second I have with him. He loves me for who I am and would never want me to change, he shows me every day that every single day.

I am a full time student and stay at home mom, it is hard work to say the least but I am loving every minute of it. Right now I am earning my General Education in Social Sciences majoring in Psychology. I am hoping to transfer to a 4 year university when I get done with my GE but for now I am working on getting my AA and then I will go from there. I hope some day to help others but as of yet I am still undecided as to what feild I wish to go in to when I graduate.

In my free time I love to relax with a good book, I love to crochet and am trying to learn how to knit and sew better. I love to be outdoors, going camping, fishing or just hiking. There is nothing like being outside on a nice cool day in California. I love the beach and the ocean and hope some day move closer. I love the snow also so this tends to be an issue with wanting to live near the beach. I was born and raised in California so I am pretty sure were not going anywhere anytime soon.

So that is about it, if there is anything else you would like to know feel free to ask, I don't bite much, I swear.